Playing with Sharp Objects

I'm hard-pressed to remember exactly how the live Steel Beauties show got started. We started doing them in 2001, and I recall that for about two years I was in the absolute best shape of my life. Then again, I was married to the director and so there was no way I could get out of going to rehearsals!

But I suppose the idea started because Duckie got bit by the director's bug after coming off of An Evening at the Grand Guignol and one of his closest buddies is a hard-core weapons fanatic. Combine that with a wife who jumps at the chance to maim people whenever possible, and you end up with a live combat show that simulates fatalities.

We were really fortunate to have an empty lot right next door to our house, and the neighbors enjoyed the free show as they watched us rehearse every weekend. But as shown here, living in Florida meant frequent afternoon downpours. So we learned not only to handle the weapons while covered with stage blood, but also how to keep our footing on slippery grass!

So for several months we honed our bodies into lean, mean fighting machines... sort of. We started off with a non-existent budget and a handful of people who didn't mind putting their lives on the line sans insurance. Yeah, we were completely nuts back then.

We all knew enough about showmanship to know that if each fight had some sort of really flashy move or a really bloody effect, the audience would forgive the fact that not one of us (with perhaps the exception of Jhon-Paul) were born with a silver samurai sword in our hands.

I'd actually had some previous experience with the bo (staff), so I was able to bring that to the table when we started plotting out our choreography.

Did I mention that we were working with "live steel"? Yeah, I know that sounds like a clever gimmick to sound dangerous and draw in the crowds. Truth was, most of the swords we bought were too strong for us to ground down with our primitive tools and so we had little choice but to flirt with death.

And we all had our share of injuries. Every weekend I could count on acquiring at least two new bruises. Steve the Bald guy had one of the more serious injuries when he was stabbed in the face with a saber. His reaction? He asked for a bandaid and a photo. We took our battle wounds as badges of honor along with the Bactine!

So armed with a team of five combatants that were not afraid to die for his vision, Duckie began running us through the paces in preparation for our first booking at a local night club. When we found out that the event was a sort of fetish show type deal, we decided to add a few girls into our mix. (You see, no one ever referred to me as a "girl".)

So Duckie brought a couple of dancing girls on board to act as our half-time show between combat tournament bouts. Jhon-Paul took the liberty of choreographing their routines. It was not unusual to walk into some strange pyramids during their rehearsals.

After we were booked to do a series of themed events, one of the dancers started training as a fighter. We learned pretty quickly that we should have kept her dancing. I kid you not, Duckie ended up bringing cue cards for her to rehearsals so she'd remember what to do during her fight.

When we started doing the shows, Duckie decided that it was his "Directorial Right" to have his photo taken with all the female members of the cast and crew before each show. This came to be known as his "Harem Shot".

My friend Lizzie (in red) has known me since I was barely a teenager and would come to Orlando whenever possible to give us a hand with the show. The picture here was from an anime-themed event, and Cleo (center) managed to get through it sans cue cards. The idea was that more people would be paying attention to what she was wearing than what she was doing! That seemed to work out well for everyone involved... although she was a notorious nut-cruncher during rehearsals. She even managed to get me in the virtual nads along with a third person during a three-way struggle fight.

One of the more interesting theme-show challenges we had was when we were told that an event we were scheduled for had a "Rocky Horror" flavor. We immediately set to work plotting out "The Rocky Horror Death Match" and choreographing the fights to the music.

We also had a blast with weapons and FX. For Steve the Bald Guy (playing Riff-Raff), we decided to have Donut (Brad) rip his hair out. So I fitted Steve with a cap that concealed a bloody rig beneath it, so when it was pulled off slowly it looked as though he was being scalped.

I played Magenta, and it was fairly easy to go from swinging a quarter-staff to wielding a mop.

I do recall the day before the show I was driving all over town looking for a pair of high heeled shoes in size 14 for Duckie's rendition of Frank-N-Furter.

The Vampire Hunter show was by far the most complicated by way of make-up and effects. Since I knew we'd be surrounded by patrons dressed in the classic beautiful vampire style, I decided that our characters were going to be throw-backs from history when blood-suckers weren't considered sexy.

This was also a show where we had to do some quick improve when an effect didn't go as planned. The idea was for me to run Steve through with my staff in full view of the audience using a rig attached to his body so he could flail his arms about while dying.

Unfortunately, the rig had other ideas and come show time, and we ended up bluffing our way through the fight.

See the promo video for Steel Beauties Live.

Duckie shows Cleo how to properly strangle his wife.	I trade in my stick for a sword during the Anime Show, fighting against Duckie for the first time.
During rehearsal with Jhon-Paul.	The Anime Show.
Duckie gets cocky after our debut performance as a combat team.	The Combat Team - Promo Shot.
Steve's promo shot.	The Dancers promo shot.